There are at least nine states in the union presently slacking off at major college football.

Ten if you count Texas.

Nine of the states—Alaska, Delaware, Maine, Montana, New Hampshire, North Dakota, Rhode Island, South Dakota, Vermont—have permission slips from their parents because they don’t field any FBS-level schools.

Texas has 12 schools in the upper division—more than any star among our fabulous 50.

Yet, last year, in the post-season Associated Press poll, after the final roundup, not long after Clemson defeated Alabama, not one team from Texas could be rustled up.

“We should be embarrassed we don’t have team in the top 25, Texas Christian Coach Gary Patterson recently said.

The lone-star state has now become the famous phrase it may have coined: “All hat, no cattle.”  The rest of this article is available to subscribers only – to become a subscriber click here.